I penned this witty little skit while I was sitting in the back seat of our taxi cab going from the airport to our hotel. Now I’m perched on a nice veranda at the hotel across the street jacking their internet connection. Internet at the ‘infamous’ Seagate Hotel is $10 a fucking day. What a rip-off! Not going to happen…

Rolling stoned in the taxi cab I reach for the Luger in my pocket. Not really. I uncrack the beer in my lap. Not really. I take pulls of a mineral water the cabbie purchased for us oh so graciously when he stopped for gas. The dude didn’t even bother to turn the car off when he pumped the gas which sent my mother spiraling into a searing frenzy. “Is that allowed? He didn’t even turn the engine off!” My dad chimed in from the front seat, “Oh, Vicki, they used to do that for years. The worst thing that happened was the occasional car blew up.” Oh golly! Imagine the kind of reaction that spawned from my mother. Oh boy. Me, I kept sipping on my mineral water praying to God that we would make it to the Seagate Hotel in one piece. After all, I’ve got a storm to whip up